In the state of nothingness

Oftentimes, we complain about trivial things…to the point where the real deal is put six feet under. These past few days, my rationalization was subjected to a thorough assessment. And it was not the most wonderful experience.

I consider this “state of nothingness” as one of the worst feelings ever. In this condition, I consider myself neither sad nor happy. I’m not so sure whether I'm in the “in-between” or "none of the above". And it has drastically changed my perspective of life, in general.

I want to believe that my life has a purpose and that my existence will be substantial. However, this unwelcoming sensation splurging all over me tends to defy this possibility. 

Demotivated and slow-paced – best describe my life at the moment. And I could not think of any valid reason about this sly truth. It seems that all the efforts that I have exerted in the past are wasted. It does not seem to matter anymore. My achievements are just a scrap of my history. Everything seems to be so…meaningless. I am so lost and I am THIS close to impassivity. 

I'll get through this.

This is just a part of growing up.


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