little miss sunshine, FTW!

Sunday mornings are not really my thing. But not today - I feel awesome.

Yes, my dear, A for Awesome.

I am not always as hopeful as I am today. I woke up an hour ago and I have this gut feeling that something good is about to happen. It's building up at the pit of my stomach.

I wonder how many people share the same feeling - waking up with a smile.
I'll be torturing myself with studying a few minutes after this so I want to be as hopeful as possible.

Med School?
There's no easy way out. It takes more than my cognitive capacity to surpass it all. I'm  not the smarty-ass or the laid-back type, I lie in-between. And I've been progressing from my comfort zone now. That's a huge achievement for the likes of me. 

As a troubled soul and spectator, learning how the world deviates from my expectations makes me want to speed up time and become a doctor sooner...'cause there's a lot of healing to do. 

Nostalgia butts in.

A week after high school graduation, I was so confused. I didn't mean to be rude, but my potentials back then weren't limited to one field or another. There were so many offers, so many choices. I couldn't pick one. 
Everything seemed to be so right for me. 

I delayed my preferences...I didn't even think I had one until that fateful conversation with a very close friend of mine during the lazy afternoon walks in the soccer field. Oh, I miss high school. *sniffs*

"The world is getting worse everyday, see the people, the kids, everything seems to be so out of place" okay, so that was 16-year old me. I just loved being problematic.

"Well yeah, so, have you decided what to take? I mean, for college?" and she was the kind of girl who's always so optimistic. We were poles apart.  

"I don't know yet. Maybe I'll go for engineering or accountancy or arts or sciences. Geez, this crab mentality is swallowing my system" and the endless rants went by.

"Why not go to medicine? or law? You have a big mouth, you can certainly do both."

I couldn't help but frown at her comment. Big mouth? Big words? Big ideas? Not really. 
Then, it hit me. 

"Law is for confident, very outspoken people. I'm not one of them. and Medicine is so expensive. I don't know if my parents can afford it. I mean, looking at our financial status, and besides, I'm not the only child, you know."

But I got saddened after saying that. I didn't know that I held back. I just...I didn't know at all. We didn't have any doctor in the family. And the idea of proceeding to Medicine was so costly and...decelerating. My ovaries could expire in no time. 

"C'mon, they will definitely find a way. You know they love you and your pretty capable of handling such matter. This med thing." she kept on nudging me over some pretty damn abstract idea. 

Out of the blue, I smiled at her and said "who knows, all I wanted in life is to heal the world, using any possible method."

Six years later, I'm enrolled in one of the finest medical schools in the country. And though this may take long for me to become a licensed physician, I'm taking the risk. I'm more than happy and thankful to my parents for the hard work they went through just for me to get into this position. So, I'm making every minute count

The sun shines brighter than yesterday, literally and figuratively. So, it has come to this. Time to hit my books. 

 Don't fret about the future young one, there's so much to learn about the world. The possibilities are endless. One path leads to another and it can be a very long and winding road...but you will eventually get to your destination. 



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1 comments:

Stella H. said...

I share your pain. Good luck with medschool.

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