Post Break Ups are the hardest

I’ve never been good at dealing with broken hearts and fits of sullen emotions. This is a skill that I am yet to master.

For the longest time that I’ve been in a relationship, I kinda forgot how it was to be single. I’ve had a hard time dealing with the post - break up “syndrome” and somehow my lifestyle became the unhealthiest – sleepless nights, passivity, junk foods for meal, cries to sleep, etc. - too lazy to move, too hurt to care.

After days of mourning and grieving, I decided to let it go. I wouldn’t benefit from this – I would only grow tired and weary. And the sleepless nights took away ten years of my life. Damn, I looked ten years older.

Anyhow, I’ve mustered my strength and summoned all the forces of the universe for me to carry on.
Also, out of depression and desperation, I couldn’t delete your number in my phonebook but I figured out a way to face this – I changed your name to Justin Bieber.

I’ve fallen in love a couple of times but I’ve never been this hooked to anyone but you
You were the only exception to every rule – to every standard that I’ve created for this kind of affection
You were the person behind all my worst and best memories
You were the reason behind the sleepless nights and countless tears…the day you said goodbye to forever
You lost faith in the love I thought was strong and unbeatable
I couldn’t masked away this depression, I found myself drowning in the abyss of loneliness
I wanted to forget you, to loathe you, to throw away everything about us just like what you did
But I couldn’t blame myself for holding on to that tiny little spark that we shared…or at least, I thought was mutual
I was love drunk for some inexplicable reasons; I couldn’t come up with a logical rationale as to how these feelings arose
You changed me, a lot. And I confessed that I’m a better person now than who I used to be
You gave me a fairy tale, a love story that was too good to be true
Then, you caused the most excruciating pain that crushed me to the core
But I was glad because I cried scarlet tears for the person who brought sunshine to my life
I loved you with all of me but somehow it was not enough to counter any emotional hurricane
After everything that we’d been through I failed to notice that it bent and broke
I was a fool for believing that we were strong – that we could endure everything
Because no matter how good or bad the situation was, my heart may waver but I didn’t lose faith
For the almost three years that we had, we shared a series of quarrels and reconciliations
You worn out of exhaustion and I, too, was getting tired of carrying this maelstrom of sullenness
I decided to move on and left this hauntingly beautiful love affair in memory
And the past tense must end now
What lies ahead? I don’t know. Nobody knows exactly.
I will not totally forget about you because the universe doesn’t work that way
Somehow, a piece of our yesterday will be forever engraved in my being
I will not hold any grudge or hard feelings towards you because I will only be pulling myself down if I do that
But one thing’s for sure, I might lose my faith in love after everything or I might not
I don’t know when I’ll fall in love the next time but I will take my time

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